SHARING and CARING…it’s what LIFE is all about!

Visiting Never Never Land

Posted by on Jan 31, 2013 in Blog, Family, Memories | 4 comments

Overlooking Mary Lake, Huntsville, ON at sunset.

Do you dream…I mean really dream?

I’m not referring to those daydreaming moments when you drift off into la-la land during a sermon at church or when you’re enroute from point A to point C and you don’t remembering passing point B. And I’m not referring to the dream of winning the multimillion dollar lottery or the dream a mother dreams when she holds her firstborn child, tucks her children into bed at night or embraces her grandchildren. (That kind of dream is filled with an emotion that is beyond defining because it reaches into a mother’s soul, her private chamber where no one dares to tread.)

No, I’m talking about those moments when your body is horizontal, your eyes are closed and you’re asleep. But your brain…that’s another story! It has become a vortex of nonsensical images, voices and scenes that defy logic.

Ever had dreams like that?

Using as my source, I discovered that, “Although it may seem like we’re dreaming from the instant we fall asleep until the moment we wake up, the average visit to Neverland is actually far shorter.” Apparently, a dream can last anywhere from a few seconds to 45 minutes, and according to the National Institute of Neurological Disorders and Stroke “one can dream an average of two hours each night. In fact, you can have several dreams during a normal night of sleep.”

No wonder some of us wake up tired!

Another interesting fact…Newsweek explains that “introverts tend to remember their nocturnal adventures better than extroverts,” supporting the concept that your dreams depend a lot on your personality. I found this very interesting, being an introvert! More often than my husband wants to admit, he is often held captive while shaving as I recount—in detail!—my ‘nocturnal adventures.’

With that said, let me ask you another question. Do your dreams vapourize upon awakening or do they follow you into your day, perhaps haunting you…or maybe providing comfort?

One such occasion happened to me in 1995. Our grandson, Ben was five months old and Christmas was a couple of weeks away.

I had a dream about my father who’d died in 1967 at the age of fifty-four—the dream was as real as life itself. I dreamt I found my dad sitting quietly in our living room, in front of the fireplace. He was in a house he’d never seen and had grandchildren he never knew, none the least of whom was his great grandson. I remember approaching him as if it was a normal thing for him to be sitting there. He had a strange look on his face. “Dad,” I said. He replied, “Buy Ben a rocking horse for Christmas…from me.” That was all; the dream ended and my father disappeared.

Doug and I went out a few days later and bought a beautiful wooden rocking horse. And I have to admit that I was hoping to dream again and tell my father what we had done. I never did.

Do dreams guide us? I’m not sure! I do know that writers are encouraged to keep a journal and pen by their bed just in case a dream influences character and plot development—I’ve had conversations with my characters in my novels that have landed in my books!  I have to admit, too, that there have been many times when, in a semi-dream state, I’ve written letters and blogs that have found their way to my computer. I’ve had strange feelings as a result of dreams…feelings of apprehension or delight, depending on how I viewed the dream;  and on occasion, I’ve been haunted by a dream that has left me unsettled until real life takes over and the dream abates.

Bottom line…everybody dreams. Just because we don’t remember our dreams doesn’t mean that we don’t regularly visit Neverland! They’re a real part of our lives, and at times I’m sure many of us wish we could just go to bed and sleep a dreamless sleep and wake up eight hours later feeling fully rested. I know I do!

Let me know how your dreams affect you…or do they?



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  1. Heather

    Very poignant account concerning the dream about your father’s request to buy Ben a rocking horse for Christmas.

    God through the Holy Spirit will sometimes guide, urge, convict or reveal (help us to understand) something when we are sleeping as our attention is not on everyday matters.

    • Ruth Waring

      You know, Heather, there’s so much that could be said about dreams. It’s far too much for me to tackle. Suffice it to say, I believe that dreams can influence a person. I’m not big on ‘interpreting’ them, only acknowledging that sometimes they are the result of events happening in our lives that get mixed up in our subconscious while we are sleeping. Sometimes there is logic (like the rocking horse); other times they are so beyond logical that I sympathize with anyone—especially my husband!—when we attempt to share them. I’m glad I discovered the ‘introvert vs extrovert’ concept. Helps me understand why Doug seldom dreams…he’s my social butterfly extrovert. Wouldn’t want him any other way…dreams or no dreams:)

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